Old Friends

2 Aug

An old friend that I haven’t seen since…umm…what year is this again? Popped up yesterday. She’s living in Oregon now and came back to VT for a family reunion and wedding with her beautiful 3 year old daughter.

She was very upset and was ready to go home – I contacted her and told her to come over when she was able to. Yesterday she called and accepted my invitation, bringing her 3 year old over to play with my two monsters.

She had the most HORRIBLE flights you could ever have – and then said that she’s been here only a few hours, only to have her grandmother tell her that both she and her brother were a disgrace to the family.

“Why are you a disgrace?” I asked.

“Because of my nose ring.”

Her entire family are strict mormons, and apparently noserings and tattoos (which is what her brother has) are not acceptable. I felt really bad, because even though most of my family doesn’t care for me (and it’s obvious), none of them has ever come out and told me that I was a disgrace.

We later got into a conversation about sex and a recent bet I lost that included having to pay up on a blow job (thankfully it was for my husband). During the discussion, we started talking about how it seems no amount of practice is enough to stop lockjaw from occuring.

“What why they call it a job.” she said.

“It’s not a job – it’s a vacation!” Scott called out from the kitchen.

I wonder, if her family knew about that discussion, that they’d tell her she had earned a 1-way ticket to Hell!

I love my friends…


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