Oh Boy

29 Jun
He eventually figured out that I really wanted to go see the movie. It took until after I was very upset for him to think about it, but he did.

He then, however, turned the entire thing around on me (as he frequently tends to do). He put tons of words in my mouth that I didn’t say, and became really angry about the whole situation.

I packed up the laptop to go downstairs to work, more sad than anything else, and he yells down, “make sure you spell my name right!”

He then walks down the stairs, opens the door, and says, “I just wanted to say – make sure you spell my name right when you talk about how much of a jerk I am on your website.”

So it went from me being a bit upset that he hadn’t tried to be romantic, to him yelling at me for putting “private information” about him up on my website.

Have I written about his dick size and forgotten about it? I didn’t think so.

He’s never read, however, about how I get frustrated at myself for wanting some things out of him. How I say that he’s an amazing father, and the best man I’ve ever known, but how I sometimes don’t get what I need…and how I feel guilty as hell about that. How I do appreciate all the small things he does around the house, and how I feel lucky to have a spouse who will help around the house, but how I feel horribly guilty that I feel bad that he never takes me out and that we rarely go anywhere.

He’s never read, and he’s assuming that I sit here and rant on him, calling him the worst spouse in the world.

In reality, he’s an amazing guy. Just like any of us, he has faults. One of his faults is, unfortunately, that he doesn’t have a romantic bone in his body, so, of course, that is the one thing that I desperately wind up craving. I try to deal with it, and, for the most part, do, yet there are sometimes when I wish he’d give me a small romantic gesture, and yet I feel guilty about it the whole time I wish for it, as though I don’t appreciate what he does for our family now, when I truly do.

Instead, he assumes that I say that worst about him. That I call him an asshole and a jerk and that I hate our entire life together.

You know what they say about assuming, right?

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