In a Weird Place

24 Feb

Last night? Was not a good night. The night before? Not very good either. Why? I HAVE NO IDEA. Let me break it down a bit here.

By not very good, I mean the sex has…well…disappeared. It’s been a week since we’ve had sex. To some, a week isn’t very long, I’m sure, but when you’re in a marriage and have an average of 3 sexual encounters a week, a week seems actually pretty long, especially if the week before that was slim pickings too.

What is going on?!

Here’s one thing – I feel fat. Scott’s working out on the bowflex again and whenever he does that he loses the few pounds he’s got on him really quickly and gains tons of muscles. This makes me feel even fatter.

Here’s another – I feel like I’m going to disappoint Scott. My sex drive has pretty much died a slow and painful death, and while I’m sure it’s all about my hormones, it’s frustrating as hell. So he starts kissing me a little bit and my first response is “go away!”

And if we do happen to connect in bed, I’m waiting for it to end.

Have you ever felt like that? Laying there, wondering how much longer it’s going to take for them to get off and trying to figure out what you can do to help them get off that much faster.

What happened to the type of sex we had when I came back from Chicago?! I mean, I know it can’t always be absolutely amazing and stunning, but come on, I’d really like it if I felt a little desire here body. I feel as though I’m making Scott feel unsexy or unappreciated.

Really? I’d rather have a foot rub than have sex right now. UGH. I hate feeling this way.

Here’s the thing – I have no one to talk to about this. I debated for hours before putting it on my blog, because I know Scott doesn’t love our sexual encounters being talked about here, especially when they’re not very good encounters.

And what can I do to fix this problem?

I’m thinking of hiring 3 studly men to come and rev my engine. I doubt it’ll help, but it’d be fun to try!


3 Responses to “In a Weird Place”

  1. Sherry February 24, 2009 at 6:07 pm #

    Is there any medication that you’re taking right now? Different meds do wonky things to sex drives, especially in women. You don’t have to answer, not everyone likes to talk about pills and the things they take them for, but if you are, that might be worth talking to your doctor about.

  2. JM February 24, 2009 at 11:14 pm #

    Watch some porn together? Stop focusing on how long it’s been because that’s just making you more stressed out?

  3. Margaret Diehl February 25, 2009 at 3:33 am #

    I’d suggest reading/watching whatever turns you on ALONE, and remembering the best times with Scott, slowly arousing yourself ( by thought or deed) without the stress of having to perform, and then be already warmed up when you see him. Having two little kids probably makes this difficult, I know-:)

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