Where Have I Been?

16 Nov

We’ve been visiting some wicked step-sister.

Scott, the kiddos, and I all took our first family trip to Disney World. I say first because it will NOT be our last. We had an absolute blast. We stayed for 8 days in Disney at the Pop Century Resort and we loved every minute that we were there.

Okay, save for the few hours when I was sick as all hell, but even when you’re sick in Disney it’s better than being sick at home!

We were only gone for 8 days, so that doesn’t explain the weeks that I’ve been abandoning this blog.

I’m sorry, blog, I’ll try to not let it happen again.

My only excuse  is that I’ve been busy. Very, VERY busy. The writing was slow over the summer, which actually was good because I had more time to work on photography. But as soon as fall hit, writing picked up, and the minute that my bosses heard I was going on vacation, they slammed me with work. And, seriously, the very day I got home I had work waiting for me. Doesn’t help that my boss is going to be going into labor any minute, and that I’m one of the more reliable writers that they have. And then, as if people physically knew that I was trying to have as little stress as possible in the few weeks before we left, I got tons of phone calls for photos. I honestly photographed a birthday party 2 days before we left.

So, yeah, I’ve been busy.

Things, however, are now back to normal since we’ve returned. The kids are whining about having to go to school again (the fact that it’s dark when we wake up probably doesn’t help much), and Scott’s whining about work again. What am I whining about? That the busy-ness is giong to start all over again.

Toad’s birthday is on December 6th – not too far from Christmas. And then there’s Thanksgiving, which is a few weeks before his birthday – yeah, it gets a bit stressful this time of year. More for financial reasons than any other. But we did very well at Disney, spending much less than I though we would, so I think we’ll be okay.

And now that family knows about this blog – mainly in-laws, it’s difficult for me to write what I want to write. I feel as though I’m on a leash. That I have to be very careful what I say on here as it may come back to bite me in the butt. I don’t want my blog to be like that – I’ve never wanted it like that. I’m extremely tempted to start another blog, but I hate to lose the history that is on this one.

I commented to Scott one day that, should anything happen to me, he’s got a record of exactly who I am right here. These blogs are things that I would love my children to read when they are adults – if I’m not here, of course. It would be a way for them to connect with me. That’s the biggest reason why I’m not going anywhere. And, honestly, I don’t have the time or the energy to keep two blogs going. Yes, I could import everything from this blog to a new one – and maybe I’ll think about it – but really what bothers me is the fact that I even have to contemplate it!

Why shouldn’t I be able to say what I want to say on here? Let’s face it, no matter what I do or how I behave, it’s pretty positive that the people who dislike me now, and who dislike this website, aren’t going to change their minds. So maybe I should just throw everything out there and say what I want to say.

I do have feelings. Some people may not think that I do, but I do. And I’ve worked extremely hard in the last few years to become a different person. To become the type of person that I can look back and be happy to have been. I’ve become a much more positive person, and take the feelings of others into account a great deal more.

So that’s where I’ve been – mired in doubt and confusion, busily working, and spending gobs of money in Florida.

But hey, at least I got to enjoy sunshine and palm trees while my friends and family got their first taste of snow ;).

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5 Responses to “Where Have I Been?”

  1. Tracey November 16, 2010 at 5:52 pm #

    YAY!

    I understand the “filter” you have to have because people that read your blog will take and twist what you say to make you look bad or make is sound like you said something you didnt…I understand completely!

    Glad you had fun in Florida!

  2. Jeannie November 17, 2010 at 12:40 am #

    Don’t think that you need to “filter” what you say.Its your words that make you look bad, not us twisting it. Had fogotten about this blog until another family member (inlaw) asked me to read it and see what you had posted about inlaws again. I think that you enjoy all the controversy. Personally, I would not want all the drama in my life. In my heart, I know how important family is and I hope that someday you will learn this too. Feel free to write what you want as I am throwing in the towel trying to keep peace.

  3. Scott November 17, 2010 at 1:06 am #

    Well I guess I have made my decision..Thanks Jean. Didn’t know that this blog revolves around the “in-laws”,,I love narrow minded people. Like I had said before, you can not pick up the phone to call. I know life is short but hey if you want to play this little games to hell with you. One person told me if you wanna play these games I am just gonna act like an a##hole, maybe not in those words but hey…You know Jean, I really appreciate that you can comment on here… and not call….thanks again…hope Christmas goes well.

  4. mel November 17, 2010 at 4:27 pm #

    You need to blog your little heart out my friend and screw what anyone else thinks. If they don’t like you, that’s on them. Be who you are…that’s the most important thing.

  5. Anna Allen Chappell December 6, 2010 at 6:08 am #

    You know you can put a password feature on those you don’t want just anyone to read? I feel you pain, though on having to be careful of what you say – I want to blog about how my in-laws sent everyone EXCEPT ME a birthday gift this year – except that they just loaned us money to make it though the month until my job starts paying…UGH.

    I, too, want my blog to be a record of sorts for my children to read. It is also my memory – as I have bi-polar disorder and it can affect my hippo-campus – the memory part of the brain – so I want as much written down as I can.

    I love reading you blog and Disney is such a fun trip!!! SIck or not I agree!

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