Poop Watch

2:30 a.m. – Go to sleep

9:30 a.m. – Wake up

9:31 a.m. – Have a sip of coffee

9:32 a.m. – Ask Scott if FT has gone potty yet (it’s been five days since he’s pooped).

9:33 a.m. – Call the clinic

9:45 a.m. – Leave the house with FT

10:00 a.m. – At the pharmacy to pick up two fleet enema’s and Go Lightly (the stuff they give you when you’ve got a CT scan coming up to clean your system out.)

10:35 a.m. – Get to the hospital for an X-Ray

10:50 a.m. – Finally get into Admitting

11:05 a.m. – Finally get permission from DCF to do the X-ray and get to Radiology.

11:10 a.m. – Waiting for X-ray tech.

11:15 a.m. – Still waiting…ask admission person to check on X-ray tech.

11:20 a.m. – Ask admission person AGAIN to check on X-ray tech.

11:23 a.m. – Get told by admission person that X-ray tech is in the E.R. and will only be a few more minutes.

11:25 a.m. – Get told by admission person that X-ray tech has not said the E.R. visit will take awhile.

11:27 a.m. – Call the clinic and explain the situation.

11:35 a.m. – Enter the clinic.

11:45 a.m. – Watch as the dr. and a nurse administer a Fleet Enema to FT while I hold his hand and watch him bawl.

11:50 a.m. – Sit and wait.

11:55 a.m. – Try to put the second Fleet in. FT was having none of it, so they stopped.

12:00 a.m. – At the store to get Tang to put in the Go Lightly so FT will drink it.

12:30 a.m. – Two cups of the Go Lightly in…still waiting!

1:25 a.m. (now) – Outside, tons of exercise, still no poop.

FT is not allowed to have ANY solid food until, and I’m quoting the doctor, “What come out looks exactly like what went in.”

We are also supposed to try to administer the second Fleet by ourselves. I’m sorry, they won’t allow you to buy any medication that has pseudophedrine in it without having your license number, social security number, address, phone number, DNA sample and SAT scores but you can easily buy something that you stick up another person’s butt that forces them to have bowel movements?

Strange, strange world.